Saturday, February 24, 2007

Televangelists' resolutions

It's been just about long enough, so let's do the research and find out how long it took the televangelists to break their 2007 New Year's Resolutions.

Pat Robertson: I resolve to not make any more embarrassing and asinine predictions about catastrophes that don't happen.
Broken after one day, Jan. 2.
"Pat Robertson predicted Tuesday that a terrorist attack on the United States would result in 'mass killing' late in 2007." (Also see video clip here).

James Dobson: I will try to maintain some influence over the Republican agenda by not alienating the leading Republican candidate.
Broken after 12 days, Jan. 12.
“I would not vote for John McCain under any circumstances,” Dobson said last month on KCBI, a Dallas Christian radio station. “I pray that we won’t get stuck with him.”

Ted Haggard: I resolve to go into intense counseling, deal with my struggle with homosexuality, and find true repentance.
Broken after 36 days, Feb. 06.
"The Rev. Ted Haggard emerged from three weeks of intensive counseling convinced he is 'completely heterosexual.'"

Pat Robertson: I will not disparage Asians by referring to people who get plastic surgery as having "Oriental-looking eyes."
Broken after 37 days, Feb. 7.
Uh, you'll have to see it to believe it.

Franklin Graham: Even though I still believe Islam is an "evil and wicked" religion I will not compound the problem by publicly trying to convert a dangerous Islamic dictator.
Broken after 45 days, Feb. 15.
"Franklin Graham met with Sudan’s Muslim president Omar Hassan al-Bashir this week and confirmed his aim of converting the leader whom many say is behind the Darfur genocide."

Benny Hinn: I will resist going to HD on my TV broadcasts so people will be less able to see how strange my comb-over hairstyle looks in detail.
Broken after 50 days, Feb. 20.
"TV Magic Performs HD Upgrade For Benny Hinn Ministries."


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