The Borat Translation

There's talk of a second Borat movie, a follow-up to his wildly popular Borat: Cultural Leanings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.

If the Jew-phobic Borat (played by Sacha Baron Cohen, who actually is Jewish) should ever take a break from man-on-man wrestling, making "sexy-time" and disco dancing, and get it in his head to do a Kazakh Bible translation, it might look like this:

In Beginnings: The Borat Translation of Genesis 1

In beginnings, false Jewish God made glorious Kazakhstan and rest of whole plant earth, besides heaven, which was color of horse p*ss. At least so my country.

But everything was blob of dirt like in latrine, slump as dead dog two days floating in fish pond. God saw stinky stuff and thought "Must change before Gypsies come with bags to sell in market." So blew on pile to say, "Lighten up! Or I crush you like we do small weasels in national game of Grazpech."

And God liked blazing light he made.

But soon come time for second morning nap, when grog shops close, and he split light in two so half died. He called Day and Night, and was pretty good. This where comes interesting pastime-- we crack stick in half and push half into ear before nap sleep. In my country all know this.

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